Going Viral and the Recovery from Surgery

Maybe it’s just me…

but I have had more hits on my blog when I don’t add a new post.

In the past two weeks, I have had over 10,000 hits and I have not so much as looked at my dashboard to see what was happening to my blog.   My post, “A Few of My Favorite Things…” is the post that has gone viral.  Since I posted this on September 29th it has had over 17,000 hits, far surpassing my record of number of hits for a posting.   I am not sure what this means but I have never posted anything to get hits anyway, so I guess I will ruin the viral run on my blog and start posting again soon.

For those of you who read my blog regularly should know by now that I have been out of commission for a while due to a few operations that I  needed to have.

I had to have my first ear surgery on Sept. 25th (after having an ear infection for two years) and it was discovered to be much worse than first expected.  The infection had infiltrated the Mastoid bone section behind the ear.  I needed to have more extensive surgery to remove all infected areas around the mastoid area and clear the infection in the middle ear.  That surgery (my second) was last Thursday (Nov 12) and the doctor told me that if he had waited another week there would have been nothing left to do.  It would have been fatal.  The infection had spread to the point that it had infiltrated the paper-thin layer that surrounds the brain.   The surgeon said he removed all the infected bone he could and it was one of the worst he had ever operated on.  They removed the bones from behind my ear down to the base of my neck and the bone above the ears had to be drilled and scrapped down to remove the infection. I know that I was in surgery for 5 hours and in recovery for almost another 5 before they moved me to ICU…I cannot describe to you the pain I was going through.

I have had some issues as a result of the surgery.  My right hand, actually my little finger and the ring finger on my right hand all the way down to my elbow is still without feeling.  I can move them and have not lost strength in them, they just feel like they are asleep the whole time.  The tips of the other three fingers are numb as well.  I also have discovered that I have lost feeling on the left side of my tongue and I still cannot feel my left ear at all.

The surgeons will not know if they got it all of the infection for three months.  If not…they have to go in and do surgery again.  This time on some very critical parts of the brain and will probably not have the best of results.   So…I am not out of the woods just yet.

I am trusting God and I will accept whatever He lays in my path.  Regardless of where that may lead me.  Thanks for the prayers and I will keep you updated on any progress or set backs. I have missed writing and I am very happy to have what I have left in my right hand.  At this point, I can still type but I cannot hold a pen just yet.

In closing, I have learned a few things over the past few weeks I have been away.   I have  learned that I need to take more time to stay in touch with those I care so much about.  It just seems like I get so busy and have the best of intentions but never seem to get around to do the things I should do…like staying in touch and being the friend I need to be to others.   For that I am sorry.

I am thankful for those of you that play along and tolerate my blog.  I look forward to writing and posting a lot over the next few years and I hope you stay along for the journey. Your friendship is appreciated and I thank you for all the kind words of encouragement.  It means more  to me than you will ever know.

Best Regards,

David

The Power of Words and Wonder of God

I’ve had my head in the book of  James  a fair bit lately and I’ve been struck by the wonder and beauty of the gospel of  Jesus Christ.  The message of God’s grace to us by sending His son to die for our sins and the wonderful news of the new life we have in the risen Christ is a precious gift.   I am awestruck at how all this fits into the majestic and eternal plan of God that He has for his people.   It is something I think about every day.

As I focus and appreciate the wonder of God, I am also challenged to have a greater appreciation for the power of His Word.  The wonder of God’s glory displayed in His word  is something I don’t always understand or appreciate the way I should.  I take for granted the power that is found there.  This power that I find in reading His word has allowed me to get through the difficult times, the lonely times, the times that I just wanted to give up.

It is through these hard times that I discover what a wonder that my God is!  God superseded the laws of nature to be born a human being.  Nothing is beyond His ability; His love for us stops at no limits to exercise itself for our complete welfare.

He who once miraculously gave His  Son wrapped in human flesh can send me the most precious of blessings in the plainest packages.  Let the wonder of our Savior’s birth convince us once and for all that we ought not expect God’s ways to coincide with our earthbound thinking and desires.  God’s rescue plan for mankind required going beyond human comprehension.   I have no struggle with trying to understand the wonder of God.  He is magnificent and I am amazed that He chose me to love.

This thing I ponder…  in the solitude of  my heart:

What God accomplishes in my  life cannot always be gauged by appearance.  These truths have become very real in my life… Life won’t always be great.  I will not always be happy.  These things are left for eternity.

If loneliness grieves me, if circumstances distress me, I must not conclude that God has turned from me.  It is through these very things that he can bring about the fulfillment of what He, in His love, is planning for my eternal benefit.  His ways are not my ways.  He often acts in ways that are mysterious to me — these “ways” are a wonderful display of His power, love, and discipline.  My failure as a believer is not in His plan for my life.  The self-inflected or unintentional trials that I  go through are ways for me to grow in my spiritual walk.  My goal…is to withstand the test and receive the blessings from Him when I endure through these hard times.

Blessed is the man who perseveres under trial, because when he has stood the test, he will receive the crown of life that God has promised to those who love him.
When tempted, no one should say, “God is tempting me.” For God cannot be tempted by evil, nor does he tempt anyone; but each one is tempted when, by his own evil desire, he is dragged away and enticed. Then, after desire has conceived, it gives birth to sin; and sin, when it is full–grown, gives birth to death.
Don’t be deceived, my dear brothers. Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of the heavenly lights, who does not change like shifting shadows.
He chose to give us birth through the word of truth, that we might be a kind of firstfruits of all he created. (James 1:12-18)

When things don’t go exactly my way, and I don’t receive what I want, all too often I think that God has withheld from me something good, even something I need.   I’m tempted to sin to get the circumstances I want, and I blame God for not just giving them to me.   But what I fail to realize is that only good things come from God.  He has given me the greatest and most perfect gift – the Word of truth, the gospel of Jesus, through which we receive eternal life (the crown of life) and belong to God to become more like Jesus Christ.  The trials, difficult circumstances and challenges we face in life are the examples that James says we are given for that very purpose…to become more Christlike.

I know where the solution lies.  It’s not in exerting more religious muscle or trying to beat myself into spiritual shape, but it’s in turning again and again to Christ.  To drink deeply of the wonder of His grace so that God’s glory in Christ would be my greatest desire and joy.    That by grace alone, through faith alone and in Christ alone I can receive the Crown of Life when I withstand the trials of this life.  Now those are Words of Power and a example of the Wonder of God.

Hey…What’s in Your Bag?

I love to watch people.  Now before you think I am some stalker that looks into windows, I guess I should clarify that I love to go and sit in the food court at the mall and watch people as they walk through the halls.  Try it sometime.  You would be amazed at what you see.

Do people really take a good look in the mirror before they step out for a night on the town?

On a recent visit to a local mall, two ladies that I have never met, sit at the table next to me.  As a result of their boisterous voices, and maybe my curiosity in their conversations, I learned quite a few things about them.  I learned what they like to eat, watch on TV, and how if their husbands would only listen, their lives would be so much happier.

On this specific day, one of them had been on a shopping spree.  Nothing too extravagant, but Dollar General, Wal-Mart, and the Dollar Tree had proven to be a landslide of savings for her that morning and she was very pleased.  She had 3 or 4 large plastic bags with tons of goodies, and I heard as she went one by one through every item and how much she had been able to purchase it for.  Was I jealous?  Nope, I’m tickled to death to see anyone keeping the economy going.

As I heard her sing the praises of her cautious buying, and how now she was the proud owner of all these items, I was reminded of a scripture I had read earlier this week.

“And beside this, giving all diligence, add to your faith virtue; and to virtue knowledge; And to your knowledge temperance; and to temperance patience; and to patience godliness; and to godliness brotherly kindness; and to brotherly kindness charity. For if these things be in you, and abound, they make you that ye shall neither be barren nor unfruitful in the knowledge of our Lord Jesus Christ.”
- II Peter 1:5-8 -

I listened as she had added to her snow village collection, and found another item she had been searching for, and in the end how happy it made her.  Then it hit me, I am keenly aware of my “baggage” of burdens and bad attitudes I pick up everyday, but what have I put in that bag that would make me  a better person?  Or even a happier person?  I took inventory of the items I’ve been told to go looking for in my life, that don’t cost me anything except for the desire to search for them, and wondered how I’ve done in my expedition.

Are my spiritual shopping bags full of the spoils of a successful trip?  Have I added to the measure of faith that I’ve been given any virtues?  Have I added knowledge, and maybe some self control?  Am I securing items in my life that in the end, will make me fruitful in what I overall seek; knowledge of Him.  I’m pleased to say I have found some of these items, but my search continues.  How about you?

Let Go…

Something to ponder…

Billy Graham tells a story of a little boy playing one day with a very valuable vase.  The little boy had put his hand into it and could not get his hand out.   It was stuck and he could not get his hand out the small opening at the top of the vase.  His mother and father tried their best to get the child’s hand from out of the vase.  They tried and tried and it still would not come out.  It was all in vain.

The only solution was to carefully break the vase so that the child would not be cut by the sharp pieces of the ceramic shards as they broke it.

Just before the father raised a small hammer to break the expensive vase, the father had an idea.  “Now son, let’s try one more thing before we break this vase.” the father said.  “Open your hand and hold your fingers out straight like mine are”  as he demonstrated with his own fingers for his son.

To his astonishment the child said, “O no, father.  I couldn’t put my fingers out like that, because if I did I would drop the penny I found in the vase!”

Smile, if you will – but thousands of us are just like this young boy.  So busy holding on to meaningless things that we forget the important things in life.

What things do you need to let go of in order to help you become a better person?  Would it be pride?  Anger?  Selfishness?

Whatever it is…let go and see what God can really do in your life.

Stupid, Ridiculous and Glorious

Maybe it’s just me… but I love a blank sheet of paper.

There are not many things I love more than having a free evening, a cup of coffee in hand and a blank sheet of paper in front of me.  I love it even more when I fill that sheet up with words.

What is exciting to me is that I never know where it is going to take me.  It is always an adventure as to where I will end up.  Each and every time I plan on writing about something specific I never do.  I am never able to plan it out like that.  I just let the story or subject just flow out of my memory.   I like the thrill of looking at a picture or listening to some music that bring back some memories and I just love to let it flow from there and see where it takes me.  It is probably why my writings are so disjointed sometimes.  Like I have always said… I love to write, I never said I was good.

They say that hindsight is 20-20, and I guess it’s true.  When I look back into my past I see the paths that I have walked…some well worn paths and others where I only see my lone footprints.  Each path has a memory, some good and some not so good.  Regardless, they are paths that I have chosen to walk and the end result of  my wanderings have given me a valuable cache of  lessons learned.

This evening  was no different from any other night.  I sat down with a wonderful cup of coffee and I started staring at the blank page in front of me.   I was wondering where it will take me tonight.  Just then a picture that is in a small frame sitting on my office desk caught my attention.   In that frame is a small faded picture of me and Bryan Blakley.  That picture was taken  just before we picked up our dates for the Homecoming Dance in 1976.  We were desperately trying to look cool in our leisure suits and long hair.  We failed.

For some reason i started to think about Bryan.  I had known him for over 40 years.  I do not really remember a time when he wasn’t part of my life.  From about the age of 6 to 17, I cannot think of one thing that I was a part of that he wasn’t involved in some way.  He and I played together and fought together.  We did just about everything together…whether that was skipping school…going on a double date or just hanging out.

One of my favorite remembrances of him was a time that we walked home from the fair about the time we were 16.  We had just spent the last night of the fair walking around checking out the girls and just having a good time.  Nothing of real significance happened that evening at the fair.  As a matter of fact, I don’t really remember anything specific even happening.  Just the two of us acting stupid, (and again) trying to be cool.  We failed again.

The fair had closed for the night about 11:30 and Bryan and I decided to walk home that night.  The Ottawa County Fairgrounds is located about six miles outside of Oak Harbor, Ohio.  At 16, the premise of walking six miles to home on a hot summer night seemed to be perfectly logical.  I remember that it was pitch black that night.  It seemed you couldn’t see past your next step.  We took our time.  There was no need to hurry.  Didn’t seem like there was that much to go back to.

Maybe it was just the mood we were in or maybe it was because it was so dark you couldn’t see your hand in front of your face.  I remember it like yesterday.   What I remember is that Bryan and I talked about everything on that long walk home.    We talked about our childhood, our families.  We talked about music,  what we liked and disliked.  We talked about girls.  We talked about our future.   He told me what his plans were for his life. Bryan wanted to leave the tiny confines of Oak Harbor, Ohio.  He wanted to see the world and the sooner the better.  For me,  I wasn’t exactly panicked about my plans.  I don’t think up to that point in my life I had ever given a second thought about what I was going to do with my life.  Hey – I was sixteen years old.  To me, the future was for someone else to worry about.

Then the subject matter changed.  We started to talk about what we believed in.   Bryan was asking all kind of questions.   That was really odd for Bryan, because there were topics he just would not discuss.  But not this night…we talked about everything.    Bryan knew me as well as anyone can know another person at 16.  We were as close as brothers.  He knew I went to church but I never once considered sharing my faith and what I really believed in to anyone before, especially him.  I mean. he knew my weaknesses and he knew my failures as well as anyone could.

But on this night, this ridiculous dark night, I shared my faith and told him what I believed.  Maybe my boldness came from the fact that it was pitch black and I could not see his reaction to my words, or maybe Bryan couldn’t see my hands shaking in fear, but for whatever reason I said it out loud.  Bryan never said a word in argument.  He just kept asking questions and I tried to answer them as best I could.  Soon our conversation drifted to another subject and nothing more was discussed about our faith and what we believed in.

We had walked almost all the way to town when suddenly Bryan and I stopped talking.  It seemed as if there was nothing left to say. I suddenly had the over whelming feeling that somehow that night I walked out of my childhood and into the next phase of my life. I wanted to stay there, in that night… more than anything I wanted before.   But I knew I couldn’t.   I was sixteen.   I slept under a roof my father owned, in a bed my father bought.    Nothing was mine, except my fears.   And my growing knowledge that not every road was going to lead home anymore. Things were about to change.  Walking through that neighborhood I grew up in, I realized that there was a time I knew every family on the block.  Their kids, names of their dogs, but most of those families were gone now.  Scattered.  The ones who stayed were not the same.  The world was moving on.  My world… their world.  And only the lights remained the same.

We didn’t really accomplish anything that night.  At least that is what I thought at the time.  Our remaining high school years that lay ahead would find us moving in different directions.  There would be other nights where we would hang out and try to be cool.  We always failed.  But the sad truth is there wasn’t ever another night just like that one.   That night and the long walk home will always be set apart in my memory and in my heart.

Over the next 30 years when our paths crossed and we would always talk and we knew that there would always be a special friendship between us, but it would never be the same as it was growing up on that alley between Walnut and Washington Streets.

Last year, Bryan’s mom passed away.   I had the extreme privilege to express my love and thankfulness for a woman who I could call Mom as easily as my own mother.  I knew Bryan had taken her death very hard.  I wanted to talk to Bryan that day, but I could see he was, as all of us were, extremely saddened by her death.  A few days later, I received an email from him.  And if you would allow me, I would like to share a portion from his letter…

Dave,

It made my day seeing you as always and I cannot express how much I appreciate your speaking at Mom’s funeral.  I do not even know how to say it, but let’s say that losing my Mom has been really hard on me.  But I know that she is in a better place and her suffering is gone.  I know I will see her again.

As you may or may not know this has been a heck of a year. 2 years in fact.  The worst time in my life physically.

I really don’t like email that much.  It seems so impersonal, especially when talking with you.  Business is different these days…I still prefer face to face or at least on the phone.

It was really great seeing you, and I wanted to let you know, even though I don’t talk about it, I wanted you to know that I am a Born Again Christian. We talked about that a long time ago when we walked home from the fair. Remember?   It has taken me a long time to come to this decision, but I have accepted Him, into my life.

I struggle with sharing it with anyone because of some of the things I have done.  I wanted you to know and I would love to speak with you about that.

Tell your Mom and Dad I said Hello…

Anyway, I am getting long winded here.

Warm Regards,  Bryan

I called Bryan a few times over the past year.  Not as many as I now wish I would have.  We talked, and talked.  About everything.  Telling stories and having a time of laughter and glorious memories.   We talked about his decision to follow Christ and how he wished he had lived his life differently.  I just reminded him that God’s grace is sufficient to cover even his worst sin.  He was forgiven and accepted…regardless what he did in his life.

Then few months ago, I received a phone call.  I just couldn’t believe the news on the other end.  Bryan had passed away.  I was already reeling from the loss of my closest friend (Bob Emrich) in May and now my childhood friend was gone as well.   I was shocked and in some ways I am still not over the loss of my two closest friends.  For whatever reason, God sometimes allows people to be taken very quickly from us.  Many times, so fast that we never get the chance to say the things we needed to say.

I will cherish that time.  The last conversation with him was no different from the conversation I would have had with him over 30 years ago when we walked home from the fairgrounds.

Our lives indeed took different paths but we will always share the common bond we found in what we call family.

Simply put, Bryan was a very good man…that loved his wife, his daughter, his step-children, his mother and father, his brothers, his relatives and his friends.  I loved him as a brother.

In closing, the lyrics to one of my favorite songs goes like this…

In Christ, there are no goodbyes
In Christ, there is no end
So I’ll hold onto Jesus with all that I have
So I can see you again.

Bryan…I miss you my friend and brother… I cannot wait until I get to see you again.

Our reunion will be…stupid, ridiculous and glorious.