I don’t know if you are anything like me.
It’s often hard for me to see God’s work in my life.
I’m living moment by moment and at times I can’t see what He is doing in my moments. The light that shows me what God is doing sometimes comes much later. Most of the time I only get a glimpse, a stream of light through the dark clouds, an ever-glow from heaven as it were.
Finding my way is the challenge of my life. That challenge is over-whelming sometimes when I think of I am going to navigate the road of life ahead when I only see a little bit in front of me.
I remember when I just got my license to drive. As most 16 years old are, I was confident that I was the best driver around. While I was driving around late at night with some friends in my 1976 Ford Pinto, I would head down a country and turn off the head lights. What a rush and what panic! Going down the road in pitch blackness at 60 miles per hour…throwing caution to the wind and not considering the consequences of our actions. At 16 you think you are 10 ft tall and bullet proof. By God’s grace I did not crash and hurt someone. The foolishness of youth.
As an adult, I am more aware of the journey through life is so dark sometimes. Many times just like that country road with the headlights off. Sometimes I feel like this darkness surrounds me like a thick blanket. Sometimes I struggle to breathe under its weight. My eyes strain to find my way and allow me to keep my feet on the right path.
This darkness is cold against my skin. It’s without life, without hope. I know I must move. I must find my way or the darkness will overtake and consume me. I must stand on my feet and continue to walk towards the ever-glow that God provides. In strength, against the darkness, I must find courage to move forward. Placing my confidence in God and His direction as to where to place my foot for the next step.
It would be so much easier for God to just bring out the huge spotlight and allow me to walk through this life with full confidence that each step I take is clear of problems and difficulty. That would make things so much easier for all of us. I am sure God could do just that, but I know that isn’t how God works. He chooses to allow us to see only the few steps in front of us. The reason? It is called faith and trust.
Finding my way….I’m still working on it.
But what I know is that God has promised to lead me, to help me, just as a guide would lead a blind man, holding my hand and directing my paths.
I’m so glad He is there…in that darkness. Leading me along through His ever-glow…even when I can’t see the way to go.